MY JOURNEY IN FINDING FULFILLMENT
REVEALING TRUE IDENTITY
I was five years into my career in the financial services industry when I saw myself starting to unravel. I was making more money than I had ever made in my entire life, but the money wasn’t making me happy. I was also drinking more alcohol and using more drugs than ever before to numb the inner conflict I was experiencing.
I was first attracted to the bank that I ended up working for because of their stellar reputation and wholesome mid-western values. I felt part of a team of people that, for the most part, I got along with really well. I still have a few of those friendships after leaving the bank nine years ago.
I made the decision to leave the company after my division had been acquired. This was the beginning of a series of events that led me to my dream job of today, which is coaching executives in eliminating emotional labor so they can become fulfilled, purpose-driven leaders.
I was about four years into my business consulting practice when I realized that I still wasn’t happy. I couldn’t understand why I still had inner conflicts needing to be muted by drugs and alcohol in order for me to feel worthy and good enough. My personal life was in shambles, and I felt lonelier than ever before.
I had received training and accreditation in several coaching modalities, but still felt like an imposter most of the time. I was sick and tired of being sick and tired. A family friend was getting a divorce and I was on her bucket list. I had liked Vanessa from the time I met her ten years prior. She had seen, firsthand, the litany of my bad decisions as a result of my lack of emotional intelligence and really didn’t want to date me. I made a decision that day to put a plug in the jug and get completely sober. I thought to myself that maybe this was the answer to my lifelong inquisition of why I was in perpetual misery. I had always assumed I was on the right track because of my studies in human behavior.
I can’t remember a time in my life when I wasn’t curious as to why people did the things that they did. I thought that everyone had the same abusive upbringing that I had, and it was only natural to self-medicate in order to feel safe. There was a missing link and I was perpetually trying to find it.
Something had to change!
UNCOVERING TRUE IDENTITY
Initially, I got sober because I wanted to date Vanessa. I was able to stop using, and we dated for a year. Things came to an end, as they should have, because I wasn’t datable. I am so grateful for that whole experience, because it led me to the next steps in reducing the emotional labor I was stuck in.
I was finally gaining the clarity to re-evaluate my core values and belief systems. In the past, I had created rules that made it easy for me to not feel worthy, and difficult rules for me to not experience feeling good enough. I began seeing big changes; others saw these changes as well. I was tapping into my intelligent mind and not using my analytical and emotional minds as much. At that point, I really started uncovering my true identity. Some of the truths I didn’t like seeing, while others thrilled me to discover.
I am not saying that I have arrived, by any means. I think that growth is a life-long endeavor, when I can remain open to change. Today, my perceptions about myself and the world have dramatically shifted. I follow my internal compass and live in truth. Every day, I do my very best, and, for the most part, I feel worthy and good enough. I have a healthy self-esteem, and I am driven to help other leaders leave suffering behind.
WHO IS ERIC MILLER TODAY?
I am sober, grateful, giving, loving, understanding, and worthy. I am a boyfriend, cyclist, coach and, advisor. I choose to live with sobriety, integrity, love, and sincerity.
I WOULD LIKE TO HELP YOU
In my journey to expanding my self-awareness, I had help. I believe in the power of having a personal coach so much, that I’ve had one for many years. I realize that there can be blind spots that only an outsider’s viewpoint can see. Let’s have a strategy session to see how I can help you. If the three questions below motivate you to take action, schedule a feasibility session with me.
1. What do you want?
2. Why do you want it?
3. What are you willing to do to get it?