HOW SELF IDENTITY CAN GET IN THE WAY OF GREAT LEADERSHIP

​Leading with Maturity Not Insecurity

Great leaders are less hesitant to ask for feedback from key stakeholders. They don’t let the appearance of being excellent prevent them from being excellent leaders. These titans are able to become vulnerable with the leadership team and staff. They are mature and secure in the emotional process of receiving feedback. They are secure in their identify as a leader and they respect the feedback that is being offered. 

When other types leaders receive negative feedback that reflects a deep-seated fear about who they are, what they do, and their ability to do it, they are easily hurt and less hesitant to ask for feedback in the future. 

Example: a colleague makes a remark that the leader’s team doesn’t seem to function well. The feedback may not have meant to be hurtful, but it strikes a nerve and a long-held belief, that there is something lacking in their ability to be a unifying leader. A response from this type of leader could be that they become more of an authoritarian. They have the mindset that “everyone will do this my way or else.” The consequence of this style of leadership is that it leads to alienation from the team.

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Overcoming Insecurity and Leading with Maturity
 
A mature -great leader is a person that can ask for feedback from anyone. They are able to compartmentalize what is being said and not take what is being expressed personally. No one can do this perfectly, but here are some ideas for getting better at it.

If you feel a sting from feedback ask yourself, 

1. Where in my life have I heard something like this before?
2. What experiences have I had with this?
3. Do I believe this about myself?
4. Is this belief based on fear of failure or is there some truth to it?
5. How can I learn from it?